It is exactly 6 years ago since I answered the phone to hear these words, “Mr Holbeck, your wife Carole passed away just a few minutes ago.” They were from the person in  charge of the Palliative Care ward at Wauchope, the neighbouring town. 

I was shocked but not surprised because the doctor had told us both just two days earlier that Carole could not live longer than 2 or 3 days. I had spent the whole day with her as she lay there in an unresponsive state. Carole had previously insisted I drove home before darkness fell,  and I did so after praying over her and telling her I loved her and that if Jesus was calling her home, I would be ok. 

Life was a bit of a blur for some time after that but I did manage to write a  tribute to her which was handed out at her Thanksgiving service a few days later,  329. A Tribute To A Wonderful Godly Woman. Carole Ann Holbeck. My Late Beloved Wife and Very Best Friend and another the night before her Thanksgiving service. [Here] Since that time I have reflected on significant moments in our relationship, little moments that have stuck in my memory for decades after.  At a church barbeque on the beach how I decided to fetch the food for a younger person who was severely physically handicapped. As I arrived back with the food there was Carole who had had the same idea also bringing food back to the young man. I remember thinking what a kind, thoughtful, generous person this young woman is. [And very attractive as well.] From that moment I saw how this attitude of thoughtful generosity marked every aspect of her life.

I remember the first time she told me she loved me and I felt the most privileged man on earth to be loved by such a beautiful, intelligent, self-giving creature. Later came the time when I asked Carole in a hypothetical way what she would say if someday I asked her to marry me. Her immediate answer was, “I would say Yes!” Hearing  this reply, I proposed and she accepted my proposal.  This to my utter amazement and deep joy. 

There is another memory that often comes into my mind. Carole had flown from Brisbane to Melbourne where I was residing in a Theological College. As we walked together along one of the streets in the CBD of Melbourne with Carole’s arm linked through mine, I thought I was the most privileged person on earth to have such a beautiful, attractive woman on my arm. I saw it as being God’s blessing on my life, thoroughly undeserved, but deeply , deeply appreciated.  

Perhaps my most recent memory comes from the time I was helping Carole move from our bedroom to her favourite chair in the lounge.  This was just a couple of days before I drove her to hospital at her request, our very last trip together. As we moved together she suddenly stopped and turning towards me said  these unforgettable words, “Thank you  for loving me! Thank you for caring for me!” I suppose they summarised our 55 years of being committed to one another and 54 years of a blissful marriage. These words have meant so much to me over the last 6 years.

There are of course many other precious memories I remember from time to time, but all of them fill me with gratitude to God for His amazing grace in allowing me to meet and fall in love in the most beautiful, attractive woman I have ever met. How gracious is our God!

Blog No. 581 posted on Friday 31 October 2025.