holbeck

Shirley said excitedly, “I feel that a whole load has lifted off my shoulders.”  She had come to see me because she felt so burdened. She had been through cancer surgery and other treatment and survived.  It soon became obvious as we talked that she was carrying a lot of resentment and unforgiveness. I shared the gospel message about Jesus who could forgive her of the things of which she said, she felt ashamed.  Not only that but He could help her forgive those who had hurt her. Then she would be able to move on in life without all the bitterness and pain she had been carrying.  I led her in a prayer of commitment to Jesus in which she thanked Him for dying for her on the cross. She then invited Him into her life.  The result was a different Shirley.  She was smiling and looking more at peace as she said those words above.

Had anything happened? Yes! A whole load of guilt had indeed been lifted from her as she prayed the prayer. She became even more relaxed in the weeks that followed. She began to understand more fully who Jesus was and the implications of what He had done for her on the cross. She began to know the peace that forgiveness brings to those who receive it from God. She also knew a greater ongoing release as she forgave more of the people she recognised had damaged her life in some way in the past. She has remained in good health many years later.

There were people in the Old Testament who had similar experiences of release through forgiveness.  One of the words used for “forgive” in the Old Testament is “nasa”. It refers to the lifting up or removal of sin leading to forgiveness in several of the 600 plus occurrences of that word in the Bible.  The word also means to lift up or carry away. It refers in a literal sense to the lifting up some part of the body such as the head, eyes, face, hands, or lifting up one’s voice.  It was used to show how God had lifted up and carried the nation of Israel to safety. We note how it is used in the following verses where nasa is underlined.

 i).            God spared His people from their enemies

The sin of the city Sodom was repugnant to God. He vowed to punish it. Abraham asked God to spare the city if there were fifty righteous people to be found in it.  His reply was “If I find at Sodom fifty righteous in the city, I will spare the whole place for their sake.” Genesis 18:26. It appears in the story that there were not even ten righteous people in the city and so punishment fell. If there had been ten, the widespread punishment of the city would have been averted; they would have been spared.

In Exodus 19 we read of the Israelites as they journeyed from bondage in Egypt towards the promised land of Canaan.  They came into wilderness of Sinai. There the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, “Thus you shall say to the house of Jacob, and tell the people of Israel:  Exodus 4)  You yourselves have seen what I did to the Egyptians, and how I bore you on eagles’ wings and brought you to myself. Exodus 19:3, 4. He reminded them of His faithfulness in leading them out of Egypt.  (He “bore” [nasa] them on eagles’ wings).

There are many people in today’s world who relate to those verses. They feel that God did carry them through the difficult times they experienced. It is the theme behind the well -known poem “Footprints in the Sand” where the writer describes life as walking with the Lord in the sand. However she notices only one set of footprints in the sand at the difficult times of life. In the poem she enquires of the Lord, Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?” The Lord replied, “The times when you have seen only one set of footprints, is when I carried you.”  Hundreds of people have shared with me over the years some very tragic stories of experiences in their lives. But many of them have shared that it was only as they thought back over those times much later on that they realised that God had indeed supported them or carried them through those times.

We see a similar reference to the Lord’s protection of Jacob in Deuteronomy 32 where again the word nasa is used for “bearing” the nation.  Deuteronomy 32:9, But the LORD’s portion is his people, Jacob his allotted heritage. 10 “He found him in a desert land, and in the howling waste of the wilderness; he encircled him, he cared for him, he kept him as the apple of his eye. 11 Like an eagle that stirs up its nest, that flutters over its young, spreading out its wings, catching them, bearing them on its pinions.  He had carried them. He had protected them. He remained trustworthy. But they needed to trust Him and to obey Him to enjoy the blessings He had in store for them in His covenant with them.

ii).          God saved His people by removing their sin from them

God taught His people in many ways that sin could be removed.  One such example was an instruction to Aaron the priest to lay hands on a live goat and confess the sins of the nation over it. Then the goat would be led into the wilderness. It was as though the sins of the nation were transferred onto the goat and the goat carried the sins far away from the people,  Leviticus 16:22 The goat shall bear all their iniquities on itself to a remote area, and he shall let the goat go free in the wilderness. The scapegoat was to bear and take away the sins of the people.

However the people of Israel were accountable to God for their sin. In many passages in Leviticus the phrase “he shall bear his iniquity” occurs where “bear” is “nasa’. (Leviticus 5:1, 17, 7:18, 17:16, 19:8, 20:17,19, 22:16). These verses speak about various kinds of sin but common to them all is the accountability to God of all the people involved.   Sin does matter to God but even in the Old Testament revelation we see the willingness of God to take away or to remove sin from those who would otherwise have to bear their sin and its consequences.

 Centuries later John the Baptist saw Jesus approaching him, (John 1:29)  The next day he saw Jesus coming toward him, and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away (Greek is airō = lift up or take away) the sin of the world!  And in John 1:36 and he looked at Jesus as he walked by and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God!”  John the Baptist obviously believed that Jesus was the long promised Messiah, the One who had come to take away the sin of the world. John the apostle wrote of Jesus, 1John 3:5 “You know that he (Jesus) appeared in order to take away sins, and in him there is no sin.” The phrase “take away”  here is (airō) the same word he used in  describing what Jesus would do as the Lamb of God in Jn 1:29.

 iii).         Humans forgave fellow humans. (nasa here used in terms of forgiving.)

It is possible for people to forgive one another! It was even in Old Testament times. Joseph did so. When Jacob the father of Joseph and his brothers died, the latter were afraid that Joseph might now pay them back for selling him into slavery.  So they sent a message purportedly coming from the lips of Jacob before he died. Genesis 50:17 “Say to Joseph, Please forgive the transgression of your brothers and their sin, because they did evil to you.’ And now, please forgive the transgression of the servants of the God of your father.”  They needn’t have worried. Joseph had already decided to forgive them and not hold their sin against them.  Joseph in that sense released them from their sin against him.

 In Exodus 10 the story is of Pharaoh summoning Moses and Aaron when a locust plague came on the land of Egypt.  He recognised that he had sinned against the God of Israel and against the people of Israel in not allowing them to depart from the land. He asked Moses and Aaron, Exodus 10:17 Now therefore, forgive my sin, please, only this once, and plead with the Lord your God only to remove this death from me.” He wanted to be released from his guilt towards God’s people. He also wanted God to cancel the consequences of his sin in rejecting God’s will for His people by refusing to let them go. He asked for forgiveness. Unfortunately he forfeited it by hardening his heart again towards God’s people.

Abigail asked David to forgive her for her husband’s evil in showing contempt towards David and his servants. (1Samuel 25:28)  Please forgive the trespass of your servant. For the LORD will certainly make my lord a sure house, because my lord is fighting the battles of the LORD, and evil shall not be found in you so long as you live. She was not personally guilty but was willing to bear any punishment that might have been meted out to her husband Nabal and to the other men who had rejected David’s messengers. She recognised David and his men as fighting the battles of the LORD, 1Samuel 25:28. She asked this servant of God for forgiveness.  David was moved by her selflessness and chose not to destroy Nabal and the males of that place as he had previously vowed to do.

In the next section we will see that God not only spared [nasa] His people and saved [nasa] them but was willing to forgive [nasa] them. But we also are faced with verses which indicate that God did not forgive some people. We need to see what those verses mean if it is true, as the Bible states, that God’s nature is to forgive.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER by Groups or Individuals. (Added on Wed 27 July 2016)

Ques.1. In the story about Shirley what experiences did she have when she asked the Lord to forgive her? Can you relate to any of those experiences? Which ones?

Ques 2. In Section i) what does the expression “bore you on eagles wings” mean for you in your own Christian walk?  Can you share times when it seemed as though the Lord was carrying you?

Ques 4. In Section ii) what do you think is the significance of Aaron laying hands on the goat? What could have been in the minds of the gathered people as Aaron prayed over the animal and then led it into the wilderness?

Ques 5. In Section iii) what do you think was the difference in the attitudes shown by Pharaoh and Abigail as they asked God for forgiveness?

Jim Holbeck. Blog No.8.  Posted Tuesday 22 February 2011. Revisited 27 July 2016

 We saw in the last article how Dawn continued to love her husband John even when he became aggressive towards her when he was drunk. She loved him and didn’t want to walk out of the marriage.  She prayed. God answered. John gave his life to Jesus and was transformed.   He asked God to forgive him and to release him from the bondage of addiction to alcohol. He was set free by the power of God and remained set free.

How does God release people?  We gain some insight by looking at another Hebrew word in the Old Testament, “Salach”. This word has the sense of bringing release to someone.  It can be translated to release, to forgive, to be forgiven, to pardon, to spare.  It is always used of God as the One who forgives or who sets free. It occurs at least 45 times in the Old Testament. We look at the variety of meanings in many of those verses to discover how rich is the concept of forgiveness.

 i).            It is used of God releasing people from the guilt of making inappropriate vows

God saw vows as being binding on those who had made them.  Here it seems to refer to vows based on premature decisions made without mature counsel.  They were in the nature of “thoughtless utterances” or “rash statements”.  If young women living at home made such vows and their fathers opposed them on the issue, then the vow would not stand. God would forgive the woman for her “thoughtless utterances” made in the vow.  Numbers 30:5  … And the LORD will forgive her, because her father opposed her.

 Similarly if a woman who had made one of these inappropriate vows were to marry and share the vow with her husband, he could oppose the vow and make it void. Numbers 30:8  … he makes void her vow that was on her, and the thoughtless utterance of her lips by which she bound herself. And the LORD will forgive her.

In both situations men who loved and cared for their loved ones could protect them from their wrong vows, and God would forgive those loved ones.

There was a twofold release. The first, from the binding power of a vow. The second, from the guilt arising from making vows in the form of thoughtless utterances.

God can do the same today in the lives of those who make “ungodly” vows. That is, vows made in anger or deep hurt which leave God out of the equation.  I have often come across folk who have vowed, ”I will never forgive them as long as I live!” Such folk may be bound up in resentment and unforgiveness and need to be released and set free.  God can indeed set people free from the power of their vows. He can also convict them of the sin of making such vows and can release them from guilt when they ask Him to forgive them.

 ii).          It is used of humans pleading with God for forgiveness

We see it used in King Solomon’s prayer at the dedication of the temple.  He anticipated that the people of Israel would sin against their God.  He asks that when he or any other Israelite turned to God for forgiveness, He would forgive them,  (1Kings 8:30)  And listen to the plea of your servant and of your people Israel, when they pray toward this place. And listen in heaven your dwelling place, and when you hear, forgive. (The latter phrase is also found in 1 Kings 8:34, 36, 39, 50).

It is instructive in looking at 1 Kings 8 to see the expressions Solomon used.  He spoke of the people repenting of their sin, confessing it to God and thus receiving forgiveness from Him.  Notice the underlined words which Solomon saw as describing the determination needed by the people to turn from their sin and back to God. 1Kings 8:46  “If they sin against you–for there is no one who does not sin–and you are angry with them and give them to an enemy, so that they are carried away captive to the land of the enemy, far off or near, 47  yet if they turn their heart in the land to which they have been carried captive, and repent and plead with you in the land of their captors, saying, ‘We have sinned and have acted perversely and wickedly,’ 48  if they repent with all their mind and with all their heart in the land of their enemies, who carried them captive, and pray to you toward their land, which you gave to their fathers, the city that you have chosen, and the house that I have built for your name, 49  then hear in heaven your dwelling place their prayer and their plea, and maintain their cause.

 In Australian terms they had to be “fair dinkum” (genuine and sincere) in their turning away from their sin, confessing it to God and in turning back to Him.  We see that especially in how they were to turn in their hearts and not just their minds, verse 47; in their need to plead with God, verse 47, and in confessing their sin as being perverse and wicked. Their repentance, meaning a change of mind and a change of heart, was to be wholehearted,  with all their mind and with all their heart. No half measures here.  It was to be genuine repentance towards One who alone could forgive them.

Daniel also asked God to forgive His people.  He recognised that forgiveness could come to the people of God, not because they were righteous, but because He was merciful. Their plea to God for forgiveness had to be based on the mercy of God and not on anything they had to offer of themselves.  Daniel 9:18-19  O my God, incline your ear and hear. Open your eyes and see our desolations, and the city that is called by your name. For we do not present our pleas before you because of our righteousness, but because of your great mercy. 19  O Lord, hear; O Lord, forgive. O Lord, pay attention and act….

 iii).         It is used of God’s forgiveness towards human wickedness and sin

God heard Solomon’s prayer at the dedication of the temple. Later the Lord appeared to him at night telling him that he had heard his prayer. He then promised Solomon that if His people humbled themselves to turn back to Him, He would forgive them and bless them, 2 Chronicles 7:14,  if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

 This is one of the most well-known passages in the Bible regarding forgiveness. It shows God’s willingness to hear His people’s request for mercy. It also shows the magnitude of His forgiveness. God encouraged Solomon by promising that should the nation sin against Him, they could be forgiven and know His ongoing blessing. However they needed to humble themselves. They had to sincerely repent of their sin. That meant turning away from it and turning back to Him.

Before we look at some other aspects of this word in Part 2 we turn to another true story which follows on from the story of Dawn and John.  It will be at the beginning of Part 2.

Questions for individuals or groups to consider. (Added Wednesday 25th of May 2016)

Ques 1). In section (i) can you think of ungodly vows that are made in today’s world? How can people be set free from the ungodly vows they have made?

Ques 2). In section (ii) we find a number of expressions that are used in seeking forgiveness from God. Which expressions do you think show genuine repentance?

Ques 3). Again from section (ii) what you think is the basis of forgiveness?

Ques 4). In section (iii) what is involved on our part in asking God for forgiveness? What does He promise to do for those who ask Him from the right motive?

Ques 5). Do you think the passage from 2 Chronicles 7:14 applies in today’s world? If so, what implications does it have for us today?

Jim Holbeck.   Blog No.6.      Posted Monday 14February 2011. Updated 25th May 2016

How could Dawn ever forgive her husband John for his physical aggression towards her? We didn’t know how violent he could become until she came to our home wanting to stay the night. He had come home drunk again in a foul mood. We discovered that there had been other episodes where he had acted aggressively towards her. Many of her friends were telling her to get out of the marriage. But she told us that she loved him dearly, and that he wasn’t “really like that” when he was sober. It was when he was under tremendous pressure at work and began to drink that the violence was manifest.  I immediately thought of phrases like, “not really facing the problem” and “misplaced loyalty”.

I told her to take some notice of her friends who knew the situation more than we did. Perhaps her friends were right. There was no justification for a man ever to physically harm his wife.  But she was adamant she wanted to stay in the marriage because she loved him so much and he “wasn’t normally like that” as she put it. In her words he was a good man who had a problem, alcohol. As the months went on, there continued to be more drunken episodes.  Yet she hung on to her marriage knowing that she had many safe places to go if she needed to escape. She kept praying for him that he would change, that he would become the man God wanted him to be. She prayed specifically that he would have victory over his addiction to alcohol.

The story has a very happy ending.  John heard the good news of what Jesus Christ had done for sinners on the cross. He came to understand two things. Firstly he could confess his sins to God and ask for, and receive, His forgiveness. Not only that but he could ask God to help him overcome his addiction to alcohol.  That is what he did with genuine repentance and a commitment to become God’s man, with His help.

The result was quite amazing. In a very short time he vowed not to touch alcohol again because it had become a danger to his marriage. He prayed to be filled with the Holy Spirit.  His character was transformed.  Instead of the anger and bitterness that had characterised him in the past, he now began to show forth Christian characteristics, the fruit of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control,  (Galatians 5:22-23). He now had a much deeper appreciation of his wife Dawn who had loved him in spite of his “episodes” and who had been willing to forgive him while praying for him to change.

He had seen in Dawn something of the character of God in her loving, forgiving compassion towards him, not wanting to leave him and hoping that he would become the man he could become, by the grace of God.

SELICHAH is used of God’s forgiving character. We see that in three verses.  In Nehemiah  9:17 the writer states that God is motivated to forgive because that is His nature.  … But You are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in faithful love, and You did not abandon them.  God was willing to forgive His own people when they turned away from Him. His love remained constant as He showered His grace and compassion on them.  Such forgiveness and love meant that He did not give up on them, even as Dawn refused to give up on John.

 The word is also used in Psalm 130:4. God knows the evil that humans do.  But the writer of Psalm 130 looked beyond the fact that God knew about sin and could “mark” (or make a record of it) it if He wished. He saw Him as One who would listen to his cries for mercy and could forgive him. Psalm 130:3-4, If you, O LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand?  4  But with you there is forgiveness, that you may be feared.  For him, God was characterised as having plentiful redemption (verse 7), and the One who would redeem or set His people free from their iniquities (verse 8).

It is a reminder to us today that God knows everything about us. He calls the sin in our lives by its true name, sin. At the same time He wants people to turn from their sin and to receive the forgiveness He offers  them in His Son.  As the apostle Peter was later to write in 2Peter  3:9  The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.

The other verse is Daniel 9:9, To the Lord our God belong mercy and forgiveness, for we have rebelled against him 10 and have not obeyed the voice of the LORD our God by walking in his laws, which he set before us by his servants the prophets.   Daniel recognised and confessed the sinfulness of all the people of God. Yet behind it all, he saw that God was a forgiving God who wanted people to return to Him to receive the forgiveness He was willing to offer them.

Later in Daniel 9:18-19 he asks God to forgive (salach) His people. In doing so Daniel recognised that forgiveness could be bestowed on the people not because they deserved it, but because God was merciful,  Daniel 9:18  O my God, incline your ear and hear. Open your eyes and see our desolations, and the city that is called by your name. For we do not present our pleas before you because of our righteousness, but because of your great mercy.

 So “selichah” is a marvellous word that describes the forgiving nature of God.  He forgives those who ask for His forgiveness because that is His nature. He hasn’t changed. He is still merciful and forgiving to those who come to Him today wanting to be forgiven.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER: (Added in May 2016)

1). What factors would govern the advice you gave to a friend (like Dawn in the story) who came to you for help whose spouse was becoming violent?

2). What were the factors that brought about such a great change in John?Why don’t some marriages have the same happy ending we see in John and Dawn’s marriage?

3). Do you think Dawn was being realistic or unrealistic in trying to hang onto her marriage? Give your reasons for thinking so.

4). In those verses which contain the Hebrew word “selichah”  for God’s forgiving nature do we get some clues as to why He forgives? What are some of those clues?

5). What does 2 Peter 3:9 tell us about God’s attitude to sinners? Is there a warning in the verse and if so what is it?

6). In the passage from Daniel 9:18-19 what can we see is the motivation and foundation for God’s forgiveness of us?

Jim Holbeck.  Blog No.5.  Posted Friday 11February 2011. (Re-visited May 2016)

What does it mean “to forgive?” It is obvious that humans find it hard to understand what forgiveness is all about. There is not much forgiveness being shown in today’s world, so there are not many examples from which to learn. In addition some of the definitions of “forgive” are misleading or totally inadequate. My dictionary of almost 3000 large pages of small print came up with this definition, to stop feeling angry with somebody who has done something to harm, annoy or upset you; to stop feeling angry with yourself /forgive somebody/yourself (for something/for doing something). The problem with such a definition is that it confuses the end-result with the process. The result of forgiving should be the lessening and ceasing of anger. However the definition gives no description of the process involved in forgiving another person in such a way that there is a lessening or ceasing of anger.  It is inadequate to tell someone who knows they need to forgive another person, “Stop feeling angry with them!” They need help to find the process to follow.

An example of true forgiveness

One of the most moving accounts I have ever read of forgiveness in action featured an incident in the life of Corrie Ten Boom recorded in her book,  “The Hiding Place”.  She was a young woman in Holland who had helped many Dutch Jews escape from the Nazis. But her family was betrayed by one of their countrymen, and she was sent with her sister to a concentration camp, where her sister died.

She wrote that after the war, in 1947, she was speaking in Germany with the message that God’s forgiveness is total. After one of the meetings, a man came forward to thank her for her message. He didn’t recognise her, but she recognised him as one of the cruellest guards at her concentration camp. He was a man partly responsible for her sister’s death. Now he stood before her, not recognising her, and wanting to shake her hand. He told her that he had been a guard at the concentration camp she had mentioned, but now he was a Christian, and had felt a need to ask her to forgive him. She tells how for seconds, she froze and could not take his hand. She knew she had to, and prayed an arrow prayer that Jesus would help her to extend her hand to take his as a token of her forgiveness for him.

She describes what happened, “an incredible thing happened. A current started in my shoulder, raced down my arm, sprang into our joined hands. And then, this healing warmth seemed to flood my whole being, bringing tears to my eyes. ‘I forgive you brother!’ I cried, ‘with all my heart.’ For a long moment we grasped each other’s hands, the former guard and the former prisoner. I had never known God’s love so intensely as I did then. But even so, I realised that it was not my love. I had tried but did not have the power. It was the power of the Holy Spirit as recorded in Romans 5:5, “because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit, given to us.”

A Process of Forgiveness

It’s a very moving account of what one woman went through as she tried to put her faith into action. It describes part of the process of forgiveness. She was faced with a choice, to forgive or not to forgive. She chose to forgive the man and to treat him as a brother in Christ. As she acted on her choice, the emotional release followed. The process beginning with the choice to forgive,  resulted in the cessation of her anger. We will see in what follows that the first part of forgiving someone is choosing to do so.

The freedom of being forgiven

One of the most exciting things in ministry is seeing people being freed of guilt from the things of the past or the present. They become almost new people with a sense of purpose in life and a real optimism about the future. Once they may have been very fearful or even emotionally paralysed because of the degree of guilt they felt. However when they asked for and experienced true forgiveness from God they began to live with a freedom they could never have envisaged. Such was the experience of John Newton of “Amazing Grace” fame. His first verse shows his emphasis on the grace of God, that He was willing to “save” him from his wretched life.

“Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,

That saved a wretch like me….

I once was lost but now am found,

Was blind, but now, I see.

When did that experience begin for John Newtown? He tells us in the next verse,

How precious did that Grace appear…

the hour I first believed.

It was when he put his trust in God that he came to understand the magnitude of his sin and the immensity of the grace and mercy of God in forgiving “a wretch” like him, as he put it.

The freedom of being forgiving

It is also exciting to see some who have experienced the freedom of forgiveness from God, go on from there to learn to forgive others who hurt them. It is very disturbing to discover how humans treat each other and to realise the degree of hurt and pain they can inflict on each other. However to see someone forgive a person who brought them great personal pain in the past, is a witness to the grace of God. By His grace they were enabled to receive His forgiveness. By experiencing His grace in being forgiven, they were motivated and empowered to forgive those who hurt them.

In coming articles we will explore the meaning of forgiveness and how we can receive and experience it for ourselves. We will also look at what is involved in really forgiving other people, and as a result knowing the freedom it brings to those bound up in their unforgiveness.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER  (Added in May 2016)

1). What does it mean to forgive someone? What do you think is involved in doing so?

2). Does the example of Corrie Ten Boom in our story encourage you towards forgiving someone or does it discourage you because you feel it is not possible for you? Why do you feel that way?

3). Do you think you have to feel forgiving towards someone before you can forgive them? Why do you think that?

4). Someone has said, “Only forgiven people can forgive.” Do you think that is a true statement? Give a reason for your answer.

5). What part of John Newton’s hymn “Amazing Grace” above really appeals to you? Why?

Jim Holbeck.  Blog No.3.    Posted on Tuesday 08 February 2011 (Revisited May 2016)

The conference speaker looked up in amazement and shock. He had issued an invitation as he usually did when speaking on a particular topic. He had asked those who believed they had never sinned, to stand. At every other conference people had smiled but no one had ever stood. That was his expectancy for this meeting as well. However to his surprise a man towards the front of the crowd stood up. There was an embarrassing silence. The speaker wasn’t sure what to do. He had hoped to show that everyone knew they were not perfect and needed to be forgiven, and so he did not expect anyone to stand.

Self Righteousness is Self Deception

The crowd looked at the “sinless” man with surprise. They looked at the speaker wondering what he would do now. After what seemed to be an interminable silence, something happened. The man’s wife who was sitting beside her husband began to laugh. She couldn’t stop. The crowd relaxed and began to laugh too. The man sat down red-faced. Wives know the truth about their husbands even when the latter are self-deceived!

Christians believe that the Bible shows that every person ever born on this earth needs forgiveness from God. (Except for Jesus whom the Bible describes as sinless). The apostle John wrote about humans in 1 John 1:8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. And in 1 John 1:10,  If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

 Those who believe they are perfect, are deceived. Everyone needs to be forgiven of their wrongdoing and sin. Shortly we will see the evidence for this conviction. But first we look at who needs to forgive.

Who Needs To Forgive?

The answer briefly is that everyone has someone or a number of people to forgive.  Not only that but they need to forgive for their own spiritual and emotional well-being as Jesus taught.

In my last article I wrote about a woman named Robyn who had to forgive her husband for walking out on her and their two young sons. Then she had to forgive her ex-husband’s new wife for her part in splitting up the family.  How they all later became friends is an astonishing story which shows the healing power of forgiveness in human relationships.

What sort of people need we to forgive? It ranges from those who brought pain into our lives when we were children, to those who hurt us in some way today. These may include those in family situations such as parents, siblings, and children as well as those in the wider family. My ministry to many people over the years has shown me that not all those in a “wider family” have the same values or moral code as those in the inner family.  I have been astounded sometimes to hear just how horrific have been the situations in what appeared to be well-adjusted, respected families and “wider” families.

Not Everything is As It Appears To Be! Nor are people! 

I think of a man who was seen as one of the most respected members of the local community, a “pillar of society”.  But one granddaughter began to ask questions of her sisters and aunts and the discovery was made that he had sexually abused a number of them. The granddaughter’s willingness to raise the difficult questions led ultimately to a great deal of healing for the women involved and protection for the younger children.  I say in all sincerity that things are not always as they appear to be, even in families.

Others who may need to be forgiven include other authority figures such as teachers or scout or guide leaders for inappropriate words or actions.  Even some psychologists and psychiatrists may need to be forgiven for what was later seen as inappropriate or harmful counselling or treatment. There are perhaps many other authority figures in our lives who were less than perfect in their contact with us. Many had a very negative impact on our lives if we are willing to admit it.

Forgiving People And Organisations

Not only do we need to forgive individuals but we may need to forgive organisations or groups of people who brought harm into our lives. For example some have had to forgive hospital boards for hiring unskilled or unethical medical practitioners who caused them or their loved ones harm through inappropriate treatment. Others have had to forgive church or secular bodies which did not monitor placement of children for adoption or foster care.

There are many in today’s world who have found it necessary to forgive a church denomination for changing its doctrinal formulas. One of the sad stories I read was of an older Bible believing minister who had remained “orthodox” throughout his whole ministry but people with a different approach to the Bible had gotten into positions of responsibility in that denomination. They had eventually succeeded in changing the doctrine and practice of that denomination. He felt he no longer belonged to “his church”.   His lament, “I haven’t changed. I still believe the things my denomination had always taught. But now the church has changed and I feel I am an outsider in my own church.”

   There are literally thousands of ministers and lay people in denominations around the world who have had to leave denominations which are turning away from God’s revealed will in the Bible and adopting secular thinking such as political correctness. Even more seriously, some have had to forgive Christian denominations for condoning and even encouraging behaviour that they believe is repugnant to God. Forgiving never means condoning evil. But forgiving releases those who are bound up with disappointment, frustration and anger to be able to make rational choices about their future.

When you really think about it there are a lot of people to be forgiven around us, even as we need to be forgiven.  The wonderful truth we will see in coming articles is that humans can forgive, and that there is a tremendous freedom that comes from doing so.  We will be encouraged by the stories of those who learnt to forgive. We will be encouraged too by reading of the blessings and healings that came to them as a result.

Questions To Consider (Added May 2016)
1). In 1 John 1:8 John writes that to think of oneself as sinless is to be deceived. Why would some people consider themselves to be perfect? How can people become deceived about themselves?
2). John added in 1 John 1:10 that if we claim to be without sin we make God out to be a liar. Why is that so?
3). What is the antidote in the following verses to getting wrong ideas about ourselves? 1Jn 1:8 “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.”
4). Why does John say that God is both “faithful” and “just” in forgiving sin? What is the importance of the word “just” in this context?
5). If God has made it possible for people to be cleansed from their sins, why do some folk still feel unclean even as believers? How can they be helped to come to a deeper sense of feeling clean?

Jim Holbeck.   Blog No.2. Posted 06February 2011  (Revisited May 2016)

(Note: This article can be downloaded as a PDF file here.) 001. FORGIVENESS. To Forgive

Is it possible to forgive those who hurt us? In this article and in future articles I want to share some stories to show that some people have been able to do so in quite amazing ways.  They are true stories but names have been changed for reasons of privacy and confidentiality. (I am hoping the stories will finish up in written publications in the days ahead.)

A Funeral Service in Sydney

“Thank you Mum for bringing Dad back into our lives.” Twelve year old Allan spoke those words with utter sincerity. One can imagine all sorts of settings where those words might have been spoken. However it was an amazing scene I was witnessing as he spoke.

You see when Allan spoke those words he was standing at a lectern in a funeral chapel in Sydney. He had asked to say something at a Funeral service. It was the service for his mother. She had died from the ravages of a terrible cancer. As he spoke the words he was  looking at the casket in which his mother lay dead. On that day I learnt a little bit more about forgiveness. I had been preaching and teaching on forgiveness for many years. Now I was seeing afresh with my own eyes the results of true forgiveness.

A Sad Story

Allan’s parents had divorced after his father Roger had walked out of the family home to begin a new relationship with another woman. Some years later his mother Robyn had come to the Healing Ministry at the Cathedral after a cancer had began to invade her body. She was full of bitterness towards her ex-husband. She was also very bitter towards his new wife  Lyn.  In the seminars on “Forgiveness” she learnt about the importance of forgiveness. She realised that she needed to experience the forgiveness of God for herself. She realised too that she needed to forgive Roger for deserting her and Lyn for destroying her marriage and family life. Robyn acted on the truths she heard at the seminars.  What happened was amazing.

An Amazing Result

As the cancer continued to spread and she became weaker and weaker she knew she had to do something about her sons. She had by now learnt to forgive Roger. So she made contact with him to explain that she was soon to die and their sons needed their father.  As her condition worsened, Roger and Lyn invited Robyn and her sons to come to live with them in their home.  Much healing took place as forgiveness was asked for and received. It was Roger and Lyn who lovingly cared for Robyn for the final months of her life. Little wonder that Allan could say at that funeral service, “Thank you Mum for bringing Dad back into our lives.”

We may wonder “How could Robyn have done that, having been through such pain and rejection?” The answer is that she did what God commands us all to do, and that is to forgive all those who have hurt us. She made a choice to forgive. God gave her the grace to do so.

It may be for some of us that our rejection was not nearly as deep as that which Robyn suffered. Others may feel that their pain was much deeper than Robyn’s. But the principles of forgiveness remain the same for each of us no matter how much rejection and pain we have been through.

How About You and Me?

We all need to be forgiven by God, and hopefully others may forgive us of the hurts we caused them. We all need to forgive, and by the grace of God we can do so.

In following articles we will see more real-life examples of those who once felt that they would never be able to forgive, but who wondrously did so. Great emotional healing (and sometimes surprising physical healing) took place in their lives.

I trust that this story and the stories to follow may encourage us to believe that to forgive, is indeed possible.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER (Added in May 2016)

1). Robyn had been taught at the Healing Ministry from Matthew 18:27 that forgiveness is a choice. How did her attitude show she had made the right choices?

2). Did Robyn’s ex-husband deserve to be forgiven by her? If not, why do you think she forgave him?

3). Are there any people we need to forgive? Do they deserve our forgiveness? What helpful example for ourselves can we see in Robyn’s attitude towards her ex-husband?

4). Paul wrote in Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”  The word to “forgive” here is from (charis) meaning “grace” or “unmerited favour”. God forgives us by giving us something we could never deserve.  In what way is our forgiveness towards others to be seen as an act of grace towards them?

Jim Holbeck. Blog No.1. Posted 04 February 2011 (Revisited  in May 2016)